:) I knew everything would work out. I’m very glad to hear it though.

I used to go days in elementary school and middle school without talking to one single person. Sometimes I would cough or say something out loud to myself, just to make sure I could still speak. I sat by myself at lunch and on the bus, for years at a time, and it made me develop a real anger and anxiety problem. My parents were called into the counselors office for some dramatic “reveal” of my “emotional issues,” which only led to isolate me even more from my peers. My teachers hated me because I was in the “gifted” program, so they had to make extra assignments for me to do when I tested out of all the units in days instead of months and resented me for getting my parents involved. So even my teachers ignored me and wouldn’t speak to me. 

I know what it is like to feel isolated and alone. 

Here is the simple way to make friends:

Talk to people!

There will always be people that you are compatible with and people that you might not get along with so well, but the only way to make friends and to connect with people is simply to talk to them. You will find that everyone feels alone some of the time; everyone wants to make friends, and everyone wants someone to talk to and share with. 

We hold these unconscious social anxieties inside us, sometimes without our knowledge, that people will think we are a loser if we talk to them, that we won’t say the right words, that we’re not cool enough or smart enough. But everyone feels like that sometimes. So open your mouth and just speak. People will often surprise you with how open and friendly they are behind their comfort walls. Talk about the weather or sports or anything; the words will come.

If you keep talking to people and letting yourself try to connect with people, it will get easier and easier and before you know it, you’ll be able to have your own group of connections and people in your life. But the first step is just to start speaking to people.  

I hope that helps some. Good luck friend. I know the right people will come into your life. 

When have you called/texted her? hmmm….?

Maybe she’s so broke she can’t afford to drive home to see you, let alone pay her internet/gas bill this month. Maybe she is so worried about whether or not she can make her rent next month, that she doesn’t talk to anyone and just works constantly so she can go to the grocery store for the first time in 2 months.

Text me. I’ll tell you about it.  

Being almost 16 is one of the worst ages in life; trust me. You are right on the verge of becoming an adult, getting a license and a job, and moving out from under your parent’s shadow. There is nothing wrong with admitting you are sad and lonely. It happens to everyone at some point, to some people everyday. I can tell you as a woman that has passed that point in life, that it will get better. I promise. 

As I have said to a few people that have asked me about being depressed and lonely, the best and only way to make a change, is to do something different. Get up and find new things, new people. Find a club at school to join, even if it’s something you’re not extremely into it or interested in. You will meet new people there and it is something to do. In my experience, the best way to overcome the sadness and the isolation is to fight it. I fight it by forcing myself to overcome my anxieties about meeting new people and just asking people that I do not know very well to hang out, to watch a movie, to drink some coffee. Sometimes I make myself go outside and casually talk to my neighbors or talk to a stranger at a bar/coffee shop. I fight it by going way out of my comfort zone. And what I have discovered is that everyone is lonely sometimes. Everyone feels like a loser at some point. Everyone wants to meet a friend and talk to someone. 

Advice for youngsters: As you become more independent and can make your own life choices, can discover and find for yourself what makes you happy, people will come in and out of your life, bringing with them new ideas, new joys, new hardships, but the ones that stick around are the ones that you should hold on to. Hold loyalty and respect in high regards and you will surround yourself with people who will support you in the good times and the bad. 

P.S. If you ever need someone to talk to, I am always here, and I know my followers are awesome listeners as well.  :)

Alcohol is an inhibitions remover, as anyone who has ever drank, in excess or not, is aware. Suddenly your conscience’s voice that usually barks at you what to do and what not to do in compromising situations, gets muffled behind a cloud of liquid courage. But that is no excuse for ill behavior, as you already know. 

My advice would be to talk to your boyfriend and discuss what happened. If he loves you and you love him, as you say you do, it will be something you can work through as a couple. Being in a relationship is hard work; it’s not the stroll through the park that TV and movies portray it to be. It takes a lot of communication and compromise and understanding. Everyone makes mistakes in life and in relationships. If they were just over every time someone stepped over the line of what is “acceptable,” no one would make it past one or two fights.

You know and feel you did something wrong already, or else you wouldn’t be asking me this right now. Talk to him. Let him know it was a mistake and it won’t happen again, and then leave the ball in his court. 

Let me know how it goes, but I think all will be fine. 

I’m black white and you’re white, so you’re like… my competition. I mean, right?

Thanks, darling. :) 

:) You’re welcome. 

Cook something and eat it… Like a normal person.